Church of the Oblongball

Fantasy Football Report

Week 1

September 10, 13, 14

2015 Fantasy Football Season

Divisional Standings


Team of the Week:
The Fightin' Plankton

The Petri Dish was rocking for the season opener and the Plankton where ready for some serious photosynthesis! This team looks like the draft treated them well this year.

Offensive Player of the Week:
Rob Gronkowski
Rushing yards 0
Rushing Touchdowns 0
Receiving Yards 94
Receiving Touchdowns 3
Total Points 21

The "Gronk" factor continues to rise in value. This guy came blasting out of the gates to score the first 3 touchdowns of the season. Is it safe to say he is the most valuable franchise player now?
Defensive Player of the Week:
J.J. Watt
Tackles 9
Sacks 2
Ints 0
PD 0
FR 0
Touchdown 0
Total Points 8.5 
Another year, and it did not take long for the J.J Watt show to start. Does anybody want to put a wager on how many times he will win this award this year?

Week in Review: The 23rd season kicked off in the traditional way with a Super Bowl rematch. This time, the Hamsterhiders got their revenge for coming up short last year against the Punkrockers. Despite what seems an unusually high number of Week 1 injuries, it was interesting to see the tight end position come on so strongly. Are wide receivers becoming skinny little over-rated ninnies? Let's see how the season plays out.
Link to Official Statistics folder: Week 1 Game Book Reports

Punkrockers vs. Hamsterhiders
Final Score
Punkrockers (Home +1) 37.5
Hamsterhiders 48.5

Star of the Game: Rob Gronkowski - 21 points

Game Comments:
Jeff Sunday August 16th, 2015 08:53 AM
Good luck to all except Carl, may Adrain Peterson smack another kid before week 1
Carl Thursday September 10th, 2015 09:35 AM
Let the games begin! Ready for a rematch, Jeff?
Carl Friday September 11th, 2015 07:29 AM
Damn it Gronk! I thought Brady was supposed to be suspended
- Choose Owner Friday September 11th, 2015 05:25 PM
It sucks when your fantasy player is kicking your favorite teams ass!
Rob Tuesday September 15th, 2015 08:37 AM
Who is Choose Owner? Is that a new member of the COB?
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Punkrockers Hamsterhiders
QB Matthew Stafford 8.00 QB Colin Kaepernick 4.00
HB Adrian Peterson 1.00 HB Lamar Miller 2.00
WR Davante Adams 2.00 TE Rob Gronkowski 21.00
WR Jordan Matthews 4.00 TE Greg Olsen 0.00
WR Dez Bryant 1.00 WR Demaryius Thomas 2.00
WR Charles Johnson 1.00 WR T.Y. Hilton 3.00
K Steven Hauschka 11.00 K Matt Prater 4.00
DL Chandler Jones 1.00 DL J.J. Watt 8.50
LB Lavonte David 4.00 LB DeAndre Levy 0.00
DB Eric Weddle 3.50 DB Morgan Burnett 0.00
OL Saints -2.00 OL Seahawks -5.00
D/ST Lions 2.00 D/ST Seahawks 9.00
Turdknockers vs. Spanish Fly Inquisition
  Final Score
Turdknockers (Home +1) 51.5
Spanish Fly Inquisition 39.5

Star of the Game: Tom Brady - 17 points

Game Comments:
Steve Monday September 14th, 2015 08:00 AM
Well played this weekend Tad!
Steve Tuesday September 15th, 2015 12:20 PM
Did I win?
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Turdknockers Spanish Fly Inquisition
QB Tom Brady 17.00 QB Peyton Manning 2.00
HB Doug Martin HB Marshawn Lynch 5.00
TE Jason Witten 14.00 TE Delanie Walker 7.00
WR Larry Fitzgerald 3.00 WR Brandin Cooks 1.00
WR Alshon Jeffery 3.00 WR Torrey Smith 0.00
WR Percy Harvin 9.00 WR Jeremy Maclin 2.00
K Caleb Sturgis K Justin Tucker 10.00
LB A.J. Hawk DL Calais Campbell 2.75
DB T.J. McDonald 2.25 DL Everson Griffen 2.75
DB Donte Whitner 3.25 LB Alec Ogletree 3.00
OL Browns -2.00 OL Bengals 0.00
D/ST Packers -4.00 D/ST Ravens 4.00
Jughuffers vs. Gnawlers
  Final Score
Jughuffers (Home +1) 30
Gnawlers 57

Stars of the Game: Matt Forte & Philip Rivers - 12 points

Game Comments:
Roman Thursday September 10th, 2015 10:22 AM
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Jughuffers Gnawlers
QB Andrew Luck 9.00 HB Philip Rivers 12.00
HB Matt Forte 12.00 HB Justin Forsett 1.00
WR Doug Baldwin 1.00 WR Antonio Brown 11.00
WR A.J. Green 2.00 WR Jarvis Landry 8.00
WR Anquan Boldin 1.00 WR Randall Cobb 7.00
WR Roddy White 3.00 WR Eddie Royal 0.00
K Adam Vinatieri -1.00 K Cody Parkey 5.00
DL Mario Williams 0.00 DL Ndamukong Suh 0.75
LB C.J. Mosley 6.50 LB Paul Posluszny 6.75
DB Landon Collins 1.50 DB Prince Amukamara 3.50
OL Steelers -2.00 OL Chargers -2.00
D/ST Patriots -4.00 D/ST Panthers 4.00
Malice vs. Bitchmonkeys
  Final Score
Malice (Home +1) 38
Bitchmonkeys 40.25

Stars of the Game: Aaron Rogers & Marcel Reece - 13 points

Game Comments:
Ben Wednesday August 05th, 2015 08:23 AM
The Bitchmonkeys are coming! Do you hear the footsteps?
Ben Monday September 14th, 2015 07:12 PM
2 touchdowns from a FB! Marcel Reece you rock!
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Malice Bitchmonkeys
QB Aaron Rodgers 13.00 QB Drew Brees 9.00
HB Eddie Lacy 9.00 HB Latavius Murray 2.00
TE Jordan Cameron 2.00 FB Marcel Reece 13.00
WR Nelson Agholor 0.00 TE Dwayne Allen 6.00
WR DeSean Jackson 0.00 WR DeVante Parker 0.00
WR Mike Evans 0.00 WR Odell Beckham 1.00
K Nick Novak 0.00 K Graham Gano 8.00
DL Rob Ninkovich 1.75 DL Charles Johnson 3.00
LB NaVorro Bowman 5.50 LB Khalil Mack 1.75
DB Tashaun Gipson 2.75 DB Harrison Smith 3.50
OL Eagles 0.00 OL Broncos -4.00
D/ST Rams 3.00 D/ST Texans -3.00
Plankton vs. Armadillos
  Final Score
Plankton (Home +1) 76.5
Armadillos 58

Star of the Game: Matt Bryant - 17 points

Game Comments:
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Plankton Armadillos
QB Russell Wilson 8.00 QB Matt Ryan 9.00
HB Jeremy Hill 14.00 HB DeMarco Murray 12.00
WR DeAndre Hopkins 17.00 TE Vernon Davis 1.00
WR Mohamed Sanu 1.00 TE Jimmy Graham 8.00
WR Mike Wallace 2.00 WR Eric Decker 7.00
WR Julian Edelman 3.00 WR Brandon Marshall 8.00
K Matt Bryant 17.00 K Mason Crosby 7.00
DL Jurrell Casey 3.50 DL Gerald McCoy 3.50
LB Brandon Marshall 5.25 LB Karlos Dansby 2.75
DB Earl Thomas 4.75 DB Ha Ha Clinton-Dix 2.75
OL Vikings -5.00 OL Cowboys 0.00
D/ST Broncos 5.00 D/ST Jets -3.00
Whiners vs. Enforcers
  Final Score
Whiners (Home +1) 75.5
Enforcers 34.25

Star of the Game: Brandon McManus - 18 points

Game Comments:
Rob Wednesday September 09th, 2015 02:39 PM
Time to give the new guy a thorough spanking. Someones leaving with plenty to whine about.
Mike Monday September 14th, 2015 09:10 PM
It just the beginning - see me in Week 15!
Rob Tuesday September 15th, 2015 08:35 AM
Just Win Baby!
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Whiners Enforcers
QB Tony Romo 14.00 QB Ben Roethlisberger 10.00
HB Jamaal Charles 9.00 HB Frank Gore 1.00
WR Vincent Jackson 2.00 WR Andre Johnson 0.00
WR Emmanuel Sanders 2.00 WR Calvin Johnson 1.00
WR Julio Jones 17.00 WR Amari Cooper 1.00
WR Keenan Allen 6.00 WR Pierre Garcon 2.00
K Brandon McManus 18.00 K Dan Bailey 11.00
DL Cameron Wake 0.00 LB Jerrell Freeman 2.50
DL Robert Quinn 6.00 DB Reshad Jones 4.75
LB Luke Kuechly 5.50 DB Charles Woodson 3.00
OL Ravens -1.00 OL Packers 1.00
D/ST Cardinals -4.00 D/ST Bills -3.00

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